It’s a joke, don’t take it seriously.
BTW, cool video, really. Very professionally designed. All those settings, very intuitive and Apple-like. I think this is reality when I first saw it… then I read the comments and know that I’ve been fooled. Great job, Onion News Network guys.
This is a tutorial to disable logging-off in Windows XP.
1. Click Start > Run then type in “gpedit.msc” (without the hyphens).
2. In the right pane,
3. Reboot and enjoy!
There are many ways to find a website’s IP address. The easiest way is to use Ping, another way is to use the free domain whois tool. For network geeks, the tips and ways provided in this post may be too easy or obsolete you have known it for a long time. The assumed audience of this post is someone who wanted to know about Ping and whois.
Ping
Pinging, in Windows cases, is easy. But, I see that my audience is not only people who use Windows. So, I’ll try the non-Windows way.
Go to http://network-tools.com/. Once you’ve there, there’s the tool called “Ping” on the left side box. Choose it, and in the box below it, enter the website domain (such as www.google.com or www.yahoo.com without http://). Then click Submit.
After clicking Submit, you can see below the website, a statistic of the ping. On the very first text, came up “Ping [ip number]“. It’s the IP number of the website.
Pinging is fully legal. It is just a technique to find the IP number and to find out whether the site is still available or not.
Whois
Whois can also be used to find physical information about the website, such as the Owner Name, Address, Phone Number. To use whois, the same website provides the same way: just click Whois on the left box, not Ping. The results would be great, see it.
Ever looked at that bootscreen in Windows XP? You know, the screen before your computer can do even anything? This screen?
Do you ever wanted to remove it? Yes? Then follow these steps.
Reboot and enjoy!
Of all the appropriate questions in Yahoo! Answers, there are also the funny questions. There are also the abusive ones. But there are also the funny questions, followed by serious answers. There are also funny questions followed by funny answers.
I’ve stumbled some of those funny questions in Yahoo! Answers while browsing the questions to answer, screen-clipped them and posted them here: (Note that the usernames have been censored to ensure privacy)
This is, of all questions, one question that has been followed by serious answers.
Another one asking for spamming techniques.
With absolutely the right answer. Just look for it on Y!A. There are also times when proper behavior are doubted by some people - why would you NOT shake hands with an unemployed?
Shaking hands with the unemployed, is, of course, contagious. It can affect your work career, your health will be inflicted too. Like described in this funny answer:
There are also some of the “unnecessary” or the “obviously unknown” ones, such as this:
Who knows? And what do you need it for, anyway? Games Ashley Tisdale play? Huh? How about Tom Cruise’s iPod serial number?
How about this. It’s a Y!A bug that transfers the same question twice, apparently at exactly the same time.
How are you going to explain that, Yahoo?
Even if it tells you to do it, don’t run Windows XP’s Network Setup Wizard on the other networked computers. You want to make the Windows XP computer conform to the existing network. The Wizard wants to make the rest of the network conform to XP.
You must disable Windows XP’s Internet Connection Firewall (ICF) on a local area network connection to other computers. If it’s enabled on a LAN, ICF will block File and Printer Sharing.
To make most network settings, you must be logged on as a user that is a member of the Administrators group.
Use the same protocol for File and Printer Sharing on all computers.
Remove all network protocols that aren’t required for a specific purpose.
If you have multiple protocols, un-bind File and Printer Sharing from all but one. Using more than one protocol, even on just one networked computer, can make networking with XP unreliable.
TCP/IP, by itself, works for all Windows networking functions.
If you assign IP addresses manually, use the same IP subnet on all computers.
NetBEUI isn’t necessary.
Use the same workgroup name on all computers.
For peer-to-peer networks, be sure NetBIOS over TCP/IP is enabled: Start, Control Panel, Network and Dial-up Connection. Right-click Local Area Connection, Properties, Internet Protocol (TCP/IP), Properties, Advanced, WINS tab, Enable NetBIOS over TCP/IP, OK, OK, Close. If you have a broadband router with a DHCP server or other DHCP server on your network (not the ISP DHCP server), try enabling Use NetBIOS setting from the DHCP server instead.
Be sure the Computer Browser Service is running… Right click My Computer, Manage, System Tools, Services, Double Click the Computer Browser service, set to Automatic, OK.
If you have Norton firewall installed you may run into problems. Try completely uninstalling it to eliminate it as the problem. If that fixes the problem, reinstall and try setting the security level to its lowest setting.
Assign share names other than the default names that have a $ in them. Share names with a $ in them are Administrative shares and cannot be seen on the network. Sharing Drives and Folders With Windows XP
Enable the guest account or setup individual accounts for users on other PCs to access shared resources… Start, right-click My Computer, Manage, Tools, Local Users and Groups…
Individual Accounts in Windows XP Pro for remote users logging in from other computures on the local network, etc. cannot have blank password. These logins can be automated in the Control Panel, User Accounts, select the account, Manage my network passwords.
If you have a broadband router, set you tcp/ip Properties to obtain the IP address automatically from the router’s built-in DHCP server. Setting DNS to auto should also work with most routers.
If you are using Windows ICS to share an Internet connection (you don’t have a broadband router), set the client machines’ tcp/dipproperties to obtain their IP addresses automatically from the ICS host (the one with the Internet connection and two network adapters). ICS has a built in DHCP server. Do not install ICS on the clients. The ICS host is assigned a static, private IP address or 192.168.0.1 for the local network adapter when ICS is installed. If static IP addresses are used for the client computers, there may be conflict with the IP address scoop of the ICS DHCP server and the network may not work.
Do not install Windows ICS if you are using a broadband router (yes, people have done that).
Verify that the Requirements for Browsing a Windows Network are satisfied.
Rather than just looking for web pages, actually Google’s Web Search has many functions. To use these extended functions one uses syntaxes. The syntaxes used in Google are:
Weather To see weather and weather forecast in any place, type “weather” followed by any U.S. zip code, or city and country. For example, typing “weather San Francisco” (without the hyphens) will return this. 
Stock Quotes To see the current market data for any given company or fund, type the ticker symbol into the search box. Then on the results page, you can click the link to see more data from Google Finance. For example, typing CSCO in a search box will return this. 
Time To see the time in many cities worldwide, type “time” followed by the city’s name. For example, typing “time Jakarta” (without the hyphens) will return this.
Sports Scores To see scores and schedules from sport teams type the team name or league name into the search box. This is enabled for the English Premier League, National Football League, National Hockey League, and Major League Baseball. For example, typing “liverpool fc” (without the hyphens) will return this.
Google Calculator Google can actually do math! And it can do it well. Type any equation into the search box, and press Enter, and Google will count it automatically for you. For example, typing 5*9+(sqrt 10)^3= will return this.
Book Search If you’re looking for results from Google Book Search, you can type the author’s name or book title into the search box. Google will return it as part of the normal web search results. For example, typing “C.S. Lewis” into the search box will return this.
Unit Conversion You can use Google to convert between many different units of measurement. Such as height, weight, and mass among others. For example, typing “54 F in C” (without the hyphens) will return this.
Synonym Search If you wanted to search only not the search term but also the synonyms, put the tilde sign (~) immediately in front of the search term. For example, typing “~sharpen” (without the hyphens) will return this.
Dictionary Definitions To see a definition for a word or phrase, simply type the word “define” then a space, then the word(s) you want. For example, typing “define psychology” will return this. To return better results, type “define:” instead.
Spell Checker Google’s spell checking machine automatically checks whether your query uses the most common spelling of a given word. If it thinks you’re more likely to return better search results with an alternative spelling, it will return the suggestion. For example, typing “expolsion” (without the hyphens) will return this. Clicking the link will launch a search with the suggested alternative.
Local Search If you’re looking for a store, restaurant, or other local businesses you can search the category for that business you can search for the category of business and location and Google will return results right on the page, along with a map, reviews, and contact information. For example, typing “Italian food 02138″ (without the hyphens) will return this. 
Movie Showtimes To find reviews and showtimes for movies playing near you, type “movies” or the name of a current film into Google’s search box followed by a U.S. zip code of your location. For example, typing “movies 12450″ will return this. 
Real Estate and Housing To see home listings in a given area type “housing”, “home”, or “real estate” and the name of the city or a U.S. zip code into the Google search box and hit Enter. For example, typing “homes Los Angeles” will return this.
Airline Travel Info Google can also be used to track any arriving and departing U.S. flights. Type in the name of the airline and the flight number into the search box and hit Enter. For example, typing “american airlines 18″ will return this.
Currency Conversion Google has a built-in currency converter. To use it, type in the currency you wanted to be converted to and hit Enter. For example, typing “150 GBP in USD” will return this.
Map Search Google will search for a map. Type in a U.S. zip code or location and the word “map” and hit Enter and Google will look for the map. For example, typing “12450 map” will return this.
Query Refinements Google ignores common words such as “and”, “or”, “the”, and other letters and digits that slow down your search without improving the results. Yet if a common word is essential for your search, you can make Google pay attention to it by placing “+” immediately in front of the word. For example, typing “peanut butter +and jelly” will return this.
Related Search To search for web sites that has common content with one web site, type “related:” immediately in front of the search term. For example, typing “related:www.cnn.com” will return this.
Fill in the Blank Sometimes the best way to have Google answer a question is by letting Google to ‘fill in a blank’ by adding an asterisk (*) at the part of the sentence or question that you want finished into the Google search box. For example, typing “lavoisier discovered *” will return this.
Package Tracking
Google can also track packages originating from UPS, FedEx or USPS. Just enter the package number into the search box and hit Enter as usual. For example, typing “1Z9999W99999999999″ will return this.
Patent Numbers
Google can also be used to track U.S. patent numbers. To do this, type “patent” followed by the patent number. For example, typing “patent 5123123″ will return this.
Ever wanted to put something very important to your computer users about their usage of the computer? But rather than putting an unnoticeable .txt file in the desktop, you wanted to create a bombastic effect?
Well, why don’t you just put the text on the Log In screen? That’ll create a powerful impact and shows them who the boss is by creating the impression that you have “full” control of the computer.
Here’s how:
1. Open Start > Run and type “secpol.msc /s” without the hyphens. (it is recommended that you copy and paste the text between the hyphens)
2. The Local Security Settings window would open. In the left pane, open Local Policies > Security Options.
3. In the right pane, look for this parameter:
“Interactive logon: Message text for users attempting to log on” and right click it.
4. On the box, type your message.
5. Press Apply then OK then reboot your computer.
E njoy!
Ah, ya. The Windows Blue Screen of Death (BSOD). We have seen it a couple of times in our computing life.
The Windows BSOD is an intriguing screen full of errors. Whenever your computer crashes into a deadly scene or just being put-out, the holy BSOD appears on-screen and walla. You just lost a day’s full of unsaved work.
The Windows BSOD is commonly found among Windows operating systems. Since Windows 3.1 there have been extensive cases about the BSOD. Take a look at Wired’s -link- BSOD throughout the ages –link- and you’ll see the difference.
Here’s a fascinating scheme. You’ve just done all your work and still you have 2 hours before you leave the workplace. Rather than playing with your coffee you decided to play Pong on your desktop. And your boss sees you. And he was mad. And he approaches you in a huff. And he decided to be mad at you because you’ve done all your work and you decided to play a little refreshment for tomorrow’s work. (press the button now) But walla! Instead of seeing the Pong game in your 2-year-old CRT monitor, the boss sees the BSOD. And he called the technician instead; asking you what happened (you can answer “Dunno”) and go home!
Here’s the trick. To get a manually-generated Windows Blue Screen of Death, you first needed a dip of knowledge into Windows’ registry (some administrators restricted their users from modifying the registry. In this case I wouldn’t recommend you to break the restriction.). Do these steps:
1. Open the Windows Registry by clicking Start > Run and type “regedit” (without the hyphens)
2. Jump to the key
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\CurrentControlSet\Services\i8042prt\Parameters
3. Create a new DWORD value (right click on the empty space on your right > New > DWORD Value) with these properties:
· Name: CrashOnCtrlScroll
· Value: 1
4. Exit the Windows Registry and save all documents.
And you’re done! Reboot the computer and you can start playing Pong immediately.
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